It’s easy to get swept up in chasing accomplishments—titles, promotions, paychecks. But for many women navigating the demanding intersection of career and self, there comes a quiet but persistent question: Why am I doing all this?
That question isn’t just philosophical—it’s a compass. And “finding your why” is the journey of turning inward to discover your true purpose so that every step forward feels intentional, aligned, and meaningful.
This concept—popularized by Simon Sinek’s TED Talk and book Find Your Why—is more than just feel-good motivation. It’s a proven framework for clarity, fulfillment, and long-term success. When you know your why, you stop living on autopilot. You start making decisions that actually feel like you.
So, What Does “Finding Your Why” Really Mean?
Your “why” is the reason you get out of bed in the morning—your core purpose, belief, or cause that drives everything else. It’s not your job title or even your goals. It’s deeper , and it’s your contribution to the world and the impact you want to have.
Simon Sinek’s “Golden Circle” model breaks this down:
- Why – Your purpose (driven by emotion and intuition)
- How – Your methods and processes
- What – The result of your work (products, services, actions)
Most people can articulate what they do. Some know how they do it. But few can clearly explain why. And yet, it’s the why that inspires us, fuels our resilience, and sets us apart in a noisy world.
Why Finding Your Why Matters—Especially Now
Burnout is rising, distractions are endless, and success often feels like a moving target, discovering your why isn’t just helpful—it’s essential. It’s the grounding force that brings clarity to chaos, direction to uncertainty, and fulfillment to your ambition. So why does it matter?
1. It Fuels Resilience
Life will test you. Whether it’s a failed launch, a job loss, or a season of personal doubt, challenges are part of the journey. But when you’re rooted in a clear purpose, you don’t crumble—you adapt. Your why becomes your anchor. It reminds you that your work has meaning beyond metrics. That you’re building something bigger than a bank account.
Purpose taps into intrinsic motivation—the kind that doesn’t waver when you’re not getting likes, raises, or applause. Instead of giving up when things get hard, you lean in. You remember what you’re fighting for, and that memory becomes the fuel to keep showing up.
2. It Guides Your Decisions
Let’s be honest: we’re constantly bombarded with choices—projects to pursue, partnerships to consider, social expectations to meet. Without a strong internal compass, it’s easy to overcommit, people-please, or veer off course chasing someone else’s version of success.
That’s where your why steps in. It acts like a decision-making filter. When you’re faced with a new opportunity, you can ask: Does this align with my purpose? Does it move me closer to the impact I want to make?
When the answer is yes, it’s an empowered yes. When it’s no, you’re not frozen in fear—you can gracefully decline without guilt. That clarity is liberating. It allows you to focus your time, energy, and creativity where it matters most.
3. It Creates Meaningful Success
Success without purpose can feel strangely hollow. You hit the goal, land the deal, grow your following—and yet something still feels… off. That’s because success that doesn’t reflect your core values often lacks meaning.
But when your achievements are aligned with your why, everything shifts. Wins feel more fulfilling. Setbacks feel more tolerable. You’re not just climbing a ladder—you’re building something that resonates with your soul.
Meaningful success isn’t about impressing others. It’s about impacting others. It’s about knowing that the work you do matters—because it’s rooted in something real.
4. It Builds Authentic Confidence
When you know your why, you stop second-guessing your worth. You start trusting your voice, your instincts, your path. Confidence no longer comes from comparison or perfectionism—it comes from authenticity.
You don’t need to pretend to be someone you’re not or follow a script that doesn’t fit. You lead with integrity. And, you speak with clarity. You show up in rooms—virtual or real—without shrinking to fit in.
And that confidence is contagious. It inspires your team. It attracts aligned clients, collaborators, and mentors. And, it sets a tone of trust and truth wherever you go.
Because when you’re anchored in your why, you stop chasing approval—and start embodying purpose.
How to Find Your Why: A Step-by-Step Framework
Finding your why isn’t about downloading a template. It’s about doing the inner work. It takes reflection, honesty, and sometimes unlearning everything you thought success was supposed to look like.
Here’s how to start:
1. Revisit Defining Moments
Look back on your life and career. When did you feel most alive? Most proud? Most “you”? These moments often hold the seeds of your why.
Ask yourself:
- What did I love about that moment?
- What impact did I make—or want to make?
- What did I learn about myself?
2. Name Your Core Values
Your values are the guardrails of your why. They’re the things you’ll fight for, even when it’s hard.
Try this:
- Write down 10 values that resonate with you (freedom, creativity, connection, justice…)
- Narrow it down to your top 3
- Reflect on how these show up in your choices—or don’t
3. Explore Your Passions and Motivations
What makes you feel lit up? What topics or causes do you never get tired of talking about? Passion often points toward purpose.
Questions to ask:
- What am I always curious about?
- What would I still be doing if no one paid me?
- What breaks my heart—and what could I do about it?
4. Identify Your Strengths
Your unique talents are part of your why. They shape how you create impact.
Ask yourself:
- What do people often come to me for?
- What feels effortless to me but hard for others?
- When have I felt most effective and confident?
5. Ask for Feedback
Sometimes, those around us see our purpose more clearly than we do. Ask close friends, mentors, or colleagues:
- What do you think I’m really good at?
- When have you seen me at my best?
- What’s the biggest impact I’ve had on you?
6. Look for Patterns
As you reflect, you’ll begin to notice themes—certain values, causes, or gifts that keep showing up. These patterns are the breadcrumbs of your why.
7. Write Your Why Statement
Your why should be simple, clear, and inspiring. Try this format:
“To [contribution] so that [impact].”
Examples:
- “To help women find their voice so that they can lead with confidence.”
- “To bring clarity to others so that they can live with purpose.”
Let it be broad enough to guide all areas of your life, but specific enough to feel true.
8. Revisit and Refine
Your why is a living, breathing thing. It may evolve. That’s okay. The key is to keep coming back to it, especially in times of transition or uncertainty.
Absolutely! Here’s an expanded and elevated version of that section that invites readers into reflection, while keeping the tone empowering, compassionate, and in line with Women’s Business Daily’s signature voice:
Tools to Start Today
You don’t need to overhaul your life overnight to begin uncovering your purpose. Finding your why is a process—a deeply personal, often transformative one—that starts with curiosity and small, intentional steps. If you’re ready to reconnect with what truly drives you, these simple but powerful exercises are a great place to begin.
Each tool below is designed to help you peel back the layers of who you think you should be, so you can remember who you really are.
Journaling Prompt: “When was the last time I felt deeply fulfilled, and what was I doing?”
This question may seem simple, but it holds so much depth. Take your time with it. Don’t just jot down surface-level answers—revisit the textures of the moment. Where were you? Who were you with? What about that experience made you feel aligned, alive, or at peace?
Fulfillment often whispers through small moments: mentoring someone who needed encouragement, speaking your truth in a meeting, creating something from scratch. Let those memories be your clues. Write freely, without judgment. You may be surprised by what bubbles up.
Tip: Do this exercise over several days. Fulfillment can show up in unexpected places, and noticing patterns takes time.
The Five Whys: Go Deeper with Every Answer
This technique, made famous in design thinking and behavior psychology, helps you move beyond surface-level goals and uncover what’s really driving you.
Here’s how it works:
- Choose a goal or desire you currently have. (e.g., “I want to start my own business.”)
- Ask yourself why you want that.
- Then, ask why again based on that answer.
- Repeat this process five times, or until you land on a core truth that resonates emotionally.
You might start with wanting more flexibility, but end with realizing that you crave freedom because you value creativity, or because you want to model possibility for your children. That’s your why—and it’s far more motivating than the original goal alone.
Tip: If it doesn’t stir something inside you by the fifth answer, keep digging. The most powerful whys often live beneath the obvious ones.
Ideal Day Visualization: Design a Life That Reflects Your Purpose
Close your eyes and imagine waking up on a day that feels completely aligned with who you are. There are no expectations to meet. No “shoulds” pulling at your time. Just your ideal rhythm.
Ask yourself:
- What time do I wake up—and how do I feel when I do?
- What kind of work am I doing? Is it creative, collaborative, impactful?
- Who am I spending time with, and how do those relationships make me feel?
- Where am I physically—at home, in nature, at a bustling studio, or something else?
- Why does this day feel meaningful to me?
Write this out like a story. The goal isn’t perfection—it’s clarity. The more vividly you can describe your ideal day, the more insight you’ll gain into what matters most to you.
Tip: Revisit this visualization regularly. Your vision may evolve, and that’s a good thing—it means you’re growing.
Core Values Card Sort: Name What You Stand For
Your values are the non-negotiables—the principles that define who you are and how you want to live. They are the backbone of your why.
To uncover yours:
- Find a downloadable core values list online (many coaching sites offer free PDFs).
- Print and cut out each value, or write them on index cards or Post-its.
- Organize them into three groups:
- Very Important
- Somewhat Important
- Not Important
- Then, take your “Very Important” stack and narrow it down to your top 5.
Ask yourself:
- Which of these do I live by every day?
- Which ones do I want to embody more fully?
- Where in my life am I compromising one of these values?
These five values can serve as a personal filter for future decisions—and can help you spot when something in your life is out of alignment.
Tip: Don’t choose what sounds impressive. Choose what feels true, even if it scares you.
Start With Curiosity, Not Pressure
The tools above aren’t about “fixing” yourself—they’re about remembering who you are at your core. This process is less about arriving at a final destination and more about reconnecting with your truth in small, meaningful ways.
Start where you are. Set aside 15–20 minutes each week for one of these exercises. Create space to explore your inner world with the same care you give to your to-do list. Because in the end, the most important work you’ll ever do is the work of living on purpose.
And here’s the beautiful part: you don’t need to have it all figured out to begin. You just need the courage to be curious.
Finding Your Why Is Just the Beginning
Discovering your why doesn’t mean everything falls magically into place. But it does mean you start living on purpose instead of by default.
You’ll say yes with more intention. You’ll navigate setbacks with more resilience. And, you’ll connect more deeply—with yourself and others.
As Simon Sinek says, “People don’t buy what you do. They buy why you do it.” And perhaps even more importantly—you’ll start believing in why you do it, too.
Because when you lead with purpose, fulfillment isn’t just possible. It’s inevitable.
Emily Sprinkle, also known as Emma Loggins, is a designer, marketer, blogger, and speaker. She is the Editor-In-Chief for Women's Business Daily where she pulls from her experience as the CEO and Director of Strategy for Excite Creative Studios, where she specializes in web development, UI/UX design, social media marketing, and overall strategy for her clients.
Emily has also written for CNN, Autotrader, The Guardian, and is also the Editor-In-Chief for the geek lifestyle site FanBolt.com
- Emma Loggins Sprinklehttps://www.womensbusinessdaily.com/author/emma-loggins/
- Emma Loggins Sprinklehttps://www.womensbusinessdaily.com/author/emma-loggins/
- Emma Loggins Sprinklehttps://www.womensbusinessdaily.com/author/emma-loggins/
- Emma Loggins Sprinklehttps://www.womensbusinessdaily.com/author/emma-loggins/